Archive for November, 2009

According to research performed by the Opinion Corporation and 24/7 Innovation in Dec 2008:

• 45% of people usually set New Year’s resolutions
• 17% set resolutions infrequently, and
• 38% absolutely never set resolutions.

Of those that do set resolutions (these add to more than 100% as some people set multiple resolutions):

• 35% want to improve their finances
• 38% want to loose weight or exercise more
• 47% want to work on their personal development or education, and
• 31% want to improve their relationships.

The problem with all of this is the fact that unless you are a businessman or a really ambitious person, you don’t measure and or track your resolutions or goals.

Jaco Beukes of LEAP IN LIFE Coaching, a certified NLP practitioner and qualified Life Coach, says that “Resolutions are easily conjured in the mind, but unless you write it down and revisit it frequently, you won’t actually know if you are successful or not. You are simply day dreaming, speculating or engaging in a bit of wishful thinking.”

The turn of each year allows you the opportunity to reinvent yourself for the next year, if you would choose to do so. But by the end of January, 90% of people would be back in “default” mode again, reverting to their old habits and ways.

This happens for various reasons: laziness, fear of change, greed, effort required, ignorance, or disbelief that the change will really make a difference.

On this point, it is important to distinguish between goals and resolutions. Goals are specific, to the point, and with a fixed deadline and outcome. Resolutions tend to be more about intentions, nice-to-haves, and dreams.

To be successful, the outcome has to be measurable, specific and time-bound. This means that you really have to make changes. And most important, you have to be held accountable by someone.

In almost all businesses, organisations or professional teams, goals are set, tracked and reported on daily; the reason for this is that businesses recognise that you can only change what you can measure and review.

Jaco states that “This power to effectively change habits and behaviours, are accessible to individuals too. You simply need to:

• Set “S-M-A-R-T” (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-bound) goals,
• Track it properly (It has to be written down)
• Frequently review your progress and performance, and
• Get someone to hold you accountable to your commitments!”

Jaco identified this need to give individuals a structured approach to set and track their goals, through his years of experience and working with and coaching individuals from a wide variety of backgrounds.

He therefore developed the “Gears of Life™” self-coaching system and teamed up with online education and personal development company, Life School trading as HABIT TOOL, to provide people with a free online version of the model.

The tool works in four easy steps:

1. Help the individual to become aware of his / her current situation
2. Assess the impact of their current direction in life
3. Set goals, and take effective action steps to achieve  them, and
4. Record, track and review your progress on a regular basis.

The platform on which the Gears of Life ™ is hosted, habittool.com, also contains other features such as online learning, a community forum and affiliate coaches to provide the necessary help, support and sense of accountability that the individual might require on his/her journey to achieve his/her goals.

New Year’s resolutions DO NOT work, unless you have a structured approach, the correct tools and support required. Fortunately, this is now available to everyone.

Where are you going…? Where’s your life heading? What mission are you on?

If you ask these questions to a soldier on the frontline, he will be able to tell you exactly what it is (unless you are the enemy, of course!). He will be crystal clear about the aims and objectives of their mission. They will also know exactly what the plan of attack is. What will happen when and by whom; even though some improvisation may be needed in the execution.

The same is true of highly successful people – they will be able to tell you exactly what they want to achieve and how they are going to achieve it. The opportunities and challenges may change along the way and they will need to be flexible and adopt, but at least they know the direction they are heading in.

If you want to increase your performance and succeed in any area of our life, you need the same outlook as these soldiers and executives. You need to know what your mission is, aim for it and focus on it 100%.

Your life’s mission is the central aspect of who you are, it defines you. This is one of, if not the most important things you can ever do in life! And that is to decide who you are, what you stand for, and what your mission in life is. When you are clear about your mission, everything else will fall into place. You’ll do what is necessary to move forward. You may not necessarily know precisely what the next steps are, but you will know what direction you are heading in.

Decide what your mission in life is today. Don’t delay! Ask yourself: what do I stand for and what do I want to accomplish with my life?

Write down your answer! Review it frequently and update it! Make this a personal document you have with you at all times.

As you become clearer; try to write it in a single sentence (the simpler, the better) and put it somewhere where you can read it daily!

Do you eat to live or live to eat…?

This is a very controversial subject and we may have different views, but we have to agree on one thing: food is a very important part of our lives.  Without it we will die physically. It is also often an integral part of socialising. Just consider how many times food plays a central role when meeting up or going out with friends or family.

Although food plays an important role in our society, it is important to remember that the primary role of food: is to be fuel for our bodies. Food is primarily important for nutrition, NOT indulgence! If you want to live with energy and increase our performance, we must consider the effect of different types of food on our physical, emotional and mental states.

For example if you eat loads of sugar and fat you will definitely experience a rise in blood sugar and a temporary “lift”, but soon thereafter you will experience a sudden drop in your energy levels and feel tired. If you want to sustain your energy throughout your day, there are two simple strategies.

1. Eat a low GI diet, (GI = glycemic index.) Foods which have a low GI slowly release energy during the day and in this way sustain you for longer periods of time. You will therefore not experience large variations in your energy levels during the day.

Examples of low GI foods are: full grain, bran, oatmeal, milk and whole wheat bread.

2. Eat around six smaller meals instead of three large means. Blood sugar levels tend to drop after a few hours.

By eating small, healthy portions of low GI food through the day, you will sustain your energy levels throughout the day.

These two eating habits will help you to work with energy throughout the day. Allowing you to work harder for longer without feeling additional strain! This will have a huge positive effect on your performance.

Has it ever happened to you that when you are about to buy a product that you’ve not really noticed before, it suddenly seems as though the whole world decided to buy exactly the same product..? Suddenly it seems that the whole world is driving the exact same Toyota or Volkswagen you plan to get…! Or just when you think you will be the only one wearing Jimmy Choo’s, it suddenly seems that everyone has some already!

Did everyone really decide to buy the same products overnight or could it be that is merely the first time you noticed? Maybe it was there all along, you were paying attention to it?

Let’s do a quick experiment: think of the colour blue, now look around the room or office where you are now. Notice how many blue items you can see.

Now look back at the screen/desk in front of you. Without looking away from your computer screen, can you list red items in the room or office? If you are like most people, you will probably find this hard to do. In fact it may feel as though there is nothing even remotely red in your vicinity! Now look around and compare the number of red and blue items.

Chances are that there will be at least 5 – 10 blue and red items each! More then what you would have noticed without this exercise.

Now, here is the big question: did it suddenly appear in the 20 seconds between looking for blue and looking for red? Most probably not. The difference was that you decided to look for it. When you were only focused on blue, it was hard to see red, but once you looked for red, even though you were aware of the blue, it was much easier to spot.

The same is true of life. We are sometimes so overwhelmed by all our problems that it is hard to think of any solutions. We feel boxed in / stuck or overwhelmed.

The easiest way to solve this is to stop focusing on issues and problems, and start focussing on options, solutions and positive realities. By specifically looking for solutions and options, you will be surprised at how many you will find. This does not mean that you ignore the problems. It just means that you make a conscious decision to look for solutions instead. Here are some quick fix steps, if you are feeling stuck or frustrated: ask yourself these questions:

1. What did I do to overcome similar problems in the past? Try to list as many solutions as possible, by continually asking yourself: what else?

2. What could I do differently to overcome this problem? Again, try to list as many possibilities as you can, by continually asking yourself: what else?

3. Following this, review what you wrote and identify what the next step is to take. Just the first step. Take this step NOW! Don’t wait! Just do it. This action will break the pattern of feeling overwhelmed. Keep repeating step 1 – 3 until you’re on an automatic recovery.

By changing your focus from problem-focused to solution-focused, it will increase your performance! And the good news: it’s as simple as 1-2-3!

Have you ever said or heard the words: “You’re not listening to me!”

This is probably one of the most common complaints in today’s rushed world. We are forced to multitask, to do ten things at once and to do them NOW!

Everybody wants a piece of us – which is exactly what happens, we only give them a piece (and sometimes even a piece of our minds!). Most of the time we don’t pay full attention, and this while one of the biggest human needs are to feel valued, heard and appreciated. So why is this important? If we give others our full attention and really listen to them, we demonstrate that they matter to us.

So how does listening to people increase my performance?

1) By listening properly, you eliminate confusion, conflicts and future misunderstandings and mistakes. And

2) Secondly you build trust in the relationship, which in turn means that the other party is more motivate to work harder for and with you!

If you value someone and they are important to you, make an effort to really listen to them, because the flip-side of the coin is that no matter how much you say that you value them, if they sense that you are not listening to them, they are not going to believe you. They will feel unappreciated, and productivity and performance goes straight down the drain!
Listening to someone doesn’t mean just keeping quiet. Although that is a good start! Really listening is to communicate to someone that they really matter to you:

1. Stop whatever else you are doing.
2. Look them in the eyes.
3. Reflect back what you heard to check whether you grasped what they were saying and most importantly,
4. Understand the spoken word in their emotional context! What they say and what they really mean might be different!

I challenge you to test this over the next 3 days! Focus on really listening and see the difference it will make to your relationships. Observe how your performance and productivity increase as a direct result!

Please leave your comments and feedback on your experience at …..!

1. Introduction

Over the next few weeks we are going to send you an email coaching series on “How to increase your Personal Performance!”

So keep a close eye on your inbox!

Performance has always been very important! Especially when it comes to business or our careers – we cannot afford not to perform well! This is true now more than ever before! In difficult economic times the pressure is on to stand out from the rest!

Naturally we all yearn to be the best, but we need something that will help us increase and sustain our performance – not just in business or our careers, but in all areas of our lives!

Sometimes we realise (very painfully) that we are so focused on our work, jobs or business that we do not invest enough time and energy in our families or other activities. The irony is that it’s usually these “activities” that give us the energy and motivation to perform at our peak and to carry on in the face of adversity! These are the things that give our lives purpose!

In short, if you want to produce top results, you need to maintain a dynamic balance in all areas of our life: physical, emotional, mental and spiritual.

In this e-mail coaching series on performance we will show you how to increase your performance through taking a number of simple, yet profound, action steps. Easy, fun and REAL-life practical action steps!

These suggestions will cover all four areas of your life, to help you improve your own life balance, while increasing your performance. What is more is that you can start to implement these tips and techniques immediately. You might consider some of the suggestions as old news, but do NOT underestimate their POWER! Try it, before you judge it!

What could you achieve if you could increase your performance by 10%..? 20%, 50%, 100%…?

Seven small words are so powerful, it can and will change your life!

There are not many words that have the power to unlock possibilities and help people fulfil their potential. But these seven words are crucial to any coach or ambitious person’s toolkit. If you know how to use them effectively, they can be a brush in your hand in front of an open canvas. However, if you use them incorrectly they will create a barrier between you and the person you work with…

Coaching requires many questions to be asked to the person you work with, and this is an art! Before discussing particular effective words, I want to share a few thoughts on questioning itself. This is to ensure that the environment in which the questions are asked is optimised…

1. Know why you are asking specific questions. Your aim is to help clients think through their circumstances and generate possibilities that will help them to reach their goals. This means that you do not need to know everything and should not ask questions to merely satisfy your own curiosity, but rather to help them come up with what will help them move forward. 

2. Make sure that you establish good rapport with your clients before you start with in-depth questioning. If in-depth questions are asked before a suitable level of rapport has been established, your questions may actually cause the client to close off instead of open up.

3. Always ask open questions, questions that cannot be answered with only a “yes” or “no”.

4. Really listen to the speaker, do not use the time to think of what you’ll say next. Let them determine the direction of the conversation.

Once you have created rapport and the right context, the following seven questioning words can be particularly powerful: what, why, how, when, where, who and if. Let’s look at each in turn:

What

This is probably the word that any good coach will use most frequently. It could be used to elicit information, help clients to think through the possible consequences of their actions and assist them in defining their goal. A very strong addition to what is the little word ‘else’. By asking what else continuously, clients are helped to generate countless possibilities from which they could then choose the most appropriate action.

Why

This word should be approached with caution. If it is used wrongly, someone might react defensively, e.g. why did you do that? These questions will then form a barrier between the coach and the client. It is therefore much better to change into a “what” question, e.g. what were the consequences of this action? Or what made you decide to take this action? However, when used to test or increase motivation, why-questions can be very effective. For instance when someone talks about their goal and you want to help them to make it into a strong and compelling reason to follow their dream, ask: why do you want this so much?

How

This word could help people to take action, by thinking through the steps they will need to take to turn their dreams into reality. Asking a question like: how will you go about achieving your goal? will help clients to think through the actions they need to take next. Another powerful how-question would be to ask: how will you know when you’ve reached your goal? This question will help clients to become very clear on what needs to happen and what specific elements are required. This will make it easier for them to recognise when they have achieved their goal.

Who

This word can be used to achieve two major outcomes. Firstly it can help people to find out who they can ask to support them or who could help them reach their goals. Secondly a who-question could help clients to realise their own responsibility for achieving their goals. This question, whose responsibility is this? Can help clients to really take ownership of what needs to be done. This could be a powerful experience for clients when they really take ownership of the goals for their life.

If

This word is used to help clients see possibilities and unlock their creativity, e.g. if you were to do this, what would happen? If you knew the answer, what would you say? If a miracle happened and everything was how you would like it to be, what would your life look like?

When

After someone has decided on their action plan, this word is probably the most effective word that could be used. This word transforms dreams into goals. The word “when” can change an idea into a specific action. When someone has made plans and seem excited about doing it, just ask: when will you do this?

Where

Although this question is not often used, it could be a real gem, especially when it is asked not to determine a specific place, but rather a direction or consequence. For instance asking someone: where will this lead? could help them to realise the consequences or possibilities of their actions and could motivate them to take action as soon as possible. So, if you asked this question after someone said they would clean their garden, they could respond with the following answers: I will not be embarrassed to have friends over anymore, I may even invite my neighbours over… I think we could actually become good friends… This question could thus generate a lot of possibilities and subsequent excitement about the future.

These seven words are powerful, they could change your practise and they could help to change people’s lives. So use them with precision and care and see how they will help people to unlock their amazing potential.

What makes successful people so successful? Talent? Hard work? Luck? Privileged circumstances…?

NO! It’s their ACTIONS! What they DO consistently and repeatedly! THEIR HABITS!!

There are many habits that separate successful people from the rest in their field. They have managed to develop certain habits of thinking, habits of being highly effective, habits of how to approach people. This is the secret ingredient to success, the one thing that can make the difference between being ordinary and being extraordinary: cultivating the right habits.

Habits are powerful beyond what you might realise! They can help you to change or direct your behaviour. The trick is to make them work for you, instead of you becoming a slave to your habits! Unfortunately when we think about habits, we tend to view them negatively. Usually the first thing that comes to mind is all our “bad” habits we have accumulated over the years (don’t worry, I will not ask you to tell someone what they are)! We’ve all experienced how destructive bad habits can be. You have probably seen how it can lead to addictions and other destructive behaviours. Before you realise, bad habits can send you on a downward spiral that is hard to break…

So, it’s safe to say: Habits are powerful, and the real power lies in the fact that it turns any behaviour into an automatic action, something you don’t have to think about, you just do it!

Imagine for a second that all those painful little tasks such as washing the dishes or taking out the trash or calling sales clients or writing your weekly report could happen on autopilot… Effortless, without the ever present back and forward negotiation in your head on if you really want to and should…

Have you ever considered how our lives could change for the better if you could manage to harness this amazing power in a positive way? What if you could use habits to put you on an upward spiral, instead of leading you down? What if you could use habits constructively instead of destructively? What if you could develop habits that will lead to success and help us to stay true to your deepest inner values?

This is possible! This is what all successful people do! All of us have access to this incredible resource that so many successful people use. The GOOD news is that you can also start to apply this wonderful resource right NOW! Here are three steps to take to cultivate powerful habits:

1. Have a clear goal

If you want to consciously create positive habits, you will first need to know what your goals are. What do you want to achieve? Where do you want to be in 5 years..?

Write down very clearly what you would like to achieve, be or acquire, and use all the goal setting tools you know to make it as clear as possible. Write it in the present tense, e.g. I am an airplane pilot. Make sure it is positive; this means that you state what you want instead of what you don’t want.

Use the SMART goal criteria to help you make your dream into a goal:

Specific: write down exactly what you want.

Measurable: how will you know when you’ve achieved it?

Achievable: is it within your control to do it?

Realistic: given your resources, can it be done?

Time-bound: when will you do it?

After you have established clearly what you want, ask yourself WHY you want it. This will provide the motivation and drive for you to reach your goal and create the correct new habits. Make sure you have strong reasons.

2. Take small steps

In order to create powerful habits, you need to know what action steps are required! Think of your goal as the first floor in your house or apartment block. Your action plan would be the steps that would take you up to the first floor. List these smaller steps in precise detail! Remember that the smaller and more exact your action steps are, the bigger the chances are that you will follow through and do them. When you are clear about your small action steps, it will be a lot easier to form powerful habits. Small steps make a BIG difference! Try it!

3. Establish a routine

This is where habits are created. Now that you know where you want to be, as well as how to get there, list which positive actions you could take on a daily, weekly or monthly basis to support your action steps. For instance if your goal is to build excellent contacts through networking and one of your action steps is to attend networking events, you could create several habits that would support this action step.

Some examples:

• Every month you could look at all the upcoming networking events and book them, every week prior to the event you could look at the profiles of other attendees and decide who you need to speak to and
• Every morning after you’ve been to the event you could follow-up on your contacts by sending them an e-mail. You thus set up strong routines to support your action plan.

Eventually these routines will become automatic, part of the way you operate, and thus habits are born that will help you to reach your goals.

Consistently ask yourself what you could do on a regular basis that will help you to achieve your action steps. These regular habits will set you apart from the rest and will lead you to the success you would like to achieve!

Read our newest publication: AUTOPILOT to Success!

This special report is the sum of 10 years worth of research and study of successful people! Don’t miss it!